Uncertain
by sockospice
Summary: Sequel to Certain, set after Raw after survivor series 2010 and therefore spoilers for those shows. Randy is hurting in more ways than one and Evan can think of only one person who can make things right. Cena, Orton, Bourne. Slash


Title: Uncertain (1/1)

Rating: PG

Characters: Randy Orton, Evan Bourne, John Cena

Content: Angst

Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue

Summary: Sequel to Certain, set after Raw after survivor series 2010 and therefore spoilers for those shows. Randy is hurting in more ways than one and Evan can think of only one person who can make things right, but that person could turn everything upside down.

Author note: no idea where this came from, it's a weird little thing.

Evan could see that every single part of Randy was aching: his shoulders slumped, the slight limp, the utter anguish on his face that revealed the pain in his heart. He'd never actually thought that John would give up everything. He knew that John would always do the right thing but thought he'd find a way out, some kind of angle. Evan had no idea that John would have sacrificed his career to do the right thing for Randy. He realised, suddenly, that Randy had known, and that was why he appeared so dejected.

They'd been friends for longer than anyone realised, right back from when they both started out training. Evan knew Randy and Cena had been more than friends at times, and he was ok with that. Randy had been honest from the start, giving Evan the chance to step away if he thought that he couldn't cope with the closeness between the two. It had taken some getting used to but Evan was willing to take an awful lot for Randy. He already did: the snide comments from other wrestlers, the assumptions people made, there were lots of things that annoyed and hurt him. Randy made up for it all though. They fitted together and what they had worked for them.

Evan didn't know what to do for his lover so he went for what his heart was telling him to do. He approached Randy slowly, sitting on the edge of the bed and reaching out one hand to stroke Randy's tattooed arm, the touch light and caring. Randy gingerly turned his head, stretching out his body and groaning at the movement.

"Do you need anything?" Evan asked softly.

"Just you," was the reply, Randy gently patting the bed cover next to him.

Evan nodded and carefully laid next to his lover, curling his body around him while trying not to put any pressure on Randy's aching limbs. He felt the older man's arms snake around him as Randy turned slightly, and then felt Randy bury his head in the crook of his neck, and in horror Evan felt Randy begin to shake.

"Randy..." Evan whispered, feeling those arms around him tighten, as if he never wanted to let go. Not knowing what to do, he gently stroked the stubble on his head, wrapping his own arms around the Viper, trying to offer some kind of sympathy and support. Slowly, Randy's breath steadied, his body stilled and he revealed a red and tear stained face to his young lover.

Evan tried to hide his gasp of shock – he had never seen his lover so vulnerable or broken. Tears started to form but he bit them back as Randy clearly needed him now, and needed him to be strong. He was almost surprised when Randy started to speak.

"I let him down. He gave up everything for me and I let him down," Evan went to protest but Randy shook his head and continued, "he needed me and I let him down. He is my best friend and I wouldn't help him."

"Randy you couldn't help, there was nothing you could have done," Evan exclaimed.

"I could have laid down for Barrett, then John would still have a job."

"You seriously think that Cena would have counted the three if you'd laid down?" Evan was incredulous, "Randy he would have given you an ass kicking and told you to do what you were born to do."

"I knew what he was going to do, and I let him." It was as if Randy didn't even hear Evan's protestations, "he never said but I knew."

"Would he want you blaming yourself now?"

"It doesn't matter, I do blame myself anyway." Randy turned over and away from Evan, feeling in his heart that he didn't deserve anything good right now, that he wasn't worthy of his lover or his best friend.

Evan sat back, shocked. Randy was always so sure, so confident; he'd never seen him like this. He went to touch Randy but the older man shrugged off the caress, so sure was he that he was undeserving of such affection. Tears pricked Evan's eyes again and he got up, walking over to his bag to grab his phone. He couldn't handle seeing Randy like this and if this was what it took to get his lover back then no matter how much it hurt he would do it.

Scrolling through his address book, he quickly found the number and dialled, taking a deep breath as he heard the gruff voice on the other end of the line.

"Hi, it's Evan."

He heard the other man gasp, and then compose himself, "what's up kid? Is Ortz ok?" Evan could hear the worry creep into John's voice when he said Randy's name.

"He needs you. Please. I wouldn't ask but I can't stand to see him like this," the lump in Evan's throat almost choked him and he stifled a sob.

"I'll be there in a second." Cena didn't need any more persuasion.

Evan tensed slightly as he heard the knock on the door. He knew John must have run from his room, and his heart sank. He opened the door and allowed Cena to enter; he hung his head in shame at his feelings, unable to look the other man in the eye.

Cena surprised the younger man by pulling him into a tight bear hug. He knew what Evan was thinking, and wanted to reassure him. Smiling sadly, he forced the high flyer to look at him, "Ev, he'll always be yours." Evan nodded, stunned, as John continued, "me and him have a connection and we'll always love each other but it's you he's chosen, and I can't disagree with his choice. You love him."

"How did you...?" Evan couldn't understand how John knew the situation, knew his feelings.

"Because if you didn't love him you wouldn't have called me – you knew you might lose him but you still called me anyway cos you didn't want to see him hurt. And I know him, I know he thinks he let me down. I'll make it right for you Ev."

"Don't make it right for me, make it right for you and Randy," Evan forced a smile, "he needs you right now."

He made to leave but Cena grabbed his arm, "don't go. He needs you too."

"I can't..."

"Please. Let me work this out for all of us," the honest pleading in John's eyes made Evan trust him, even though Evan was basically giving another man permission to comfort his lover in any way possible.

"Ok," the swirl of pain in Evan's mind became trust but fear still remained. "I'll... I'll just sit over there."

John nodded, watching the smaller man as he slumped on the sofa, wishing he could soothe Evan's mind but understanding the pain and distrust. Slowly he approached the bed, sitting down at the side of Randy, looking at his back. Carefully he placed one large hand on Randy's shoulder, feeling the younger man stiffen under the touch. "Ortz."

Slowly, wide eyed, Randy turned around, "why are you here?"

"Because you need me to be."

"I don't deserve you to be."

"Oh Randy," John sighed, shaking his head, "come here."

John prompted the Viper to sit up and immediately threw his arms around him. Randy sat stiffly at first, but eventually accepted the embrace and reciprocated. The hug lasted for minutes but soothed a lifetime of regrets. John began whispering something in Randy's ear that instantly calmed the younger man, allowing the strain and guilt to leave his face.

Evan watched the scene nervously. He knew he'd taken a risk; what if Randy decided he still wanted John? They had a long and complicated history and knew each other better than anyone else. He'd known though, John was what Randy needed. Evan couldn't soothe his troubled heart, John could, and would, and if Randy was truly happy then Evan felt like he could cope with whatever happened next.

John and Randy continued to talk quietly, Randy smiling slightly and holding on to John's hand as the conversation flowed. Suddenly everything went quiet and Randy nodded. Evan watched as John leaned forwards and softly placed a kiss on Randy's lips. A kiss which Randy responded to, pulling John closer, one hand on the back of his neck.

Evan couldn't stop the cry of devastation that left his throat, as much as he wanted to. He watched the man he loved kiss another man and nothing had ever hurt so much. Randy had made his choice.

John broke the kiss first, a crooked grin on his face. He nodded at Randy and affectionately brushed a hand across his cheek. "I think this is it Ortz. Your boy needs you now."

Randy nodded, "thank you. For everything."

"I love you Ortz, and I'd do anything for you. You know that now, yeah?"

"Yeah."

John stood up and walked to the door without looking back. Only when he had almost left did he turn around to see Randy stood with Evan held tightly in his arms, kissing as if their lives depended on it. With a bitter sweet smile, knowing that the man he had always loved would be happy with the man that he loved, he walked away.


End file.
